March B/S posting thread Part 2
#57
03-08-2008 | 06:25 PM
Posting Legend
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 32,025
Likes: 0
From: Where Critters Are Free
SMILE!
Florida's Senior Hit Parade!
It was fun being a baby boomer... until now. Some of the artists of the
60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby
Boomers.
They include:
Herman's Hermits--- Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker.
Ringo Starr--- I Get By With a Little Help From Depends.
The Bee Gees--- How Can You Mend a Broken Hip.
Bobby Darin--- Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash.
Roberta Flack--- The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face.
Johnny Nash--- I Can't See Clearly Now.
Paul Simon--- Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver
The Commodores--- Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom.
Marvin Gaye--- Heard It Through the Grape Nuts.
Procol Harem--- A Whiter Shade of Hair.
Leo Sayer--- You Make Me Feel Like Napping.
The Temptations--- Papa's Got a Kidney Stone.
Abba--- Denture Queen.
Tony Orlando--- Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall.
Helen Reddy--- I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore.
Leslie Gore--- It's My Procedure, and I'll Cry If I Want To.
And my favorite:
Willie Nelson--- On the Commode Again
Florida's Senior Hit Parade!
It was fun being a baby boomer... until now. Some of the artists of the
60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby
Boomers.
They include:
Herman's Hermits--- Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker.
Ringo Starr--- I Get By With a Little Help From Depends.
The Bee Gees--- How Can You Mend a Broken Hip.
Bobby Darin--- Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash.
Roberta Flack--- The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face.
Johnny Nash--- I Can't See Clearly Now.
Paul Simon--- Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver
The Commodores--- Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom.
Marvin Gaye--- Heard It Through the Grape Nuts.
Procol Harem--- A Whiter Shade of Hair.
Leo Sayer--- You Make Me Feel Like Napping.
The Temptations--- Papa's Got a Kidney Stone.
Abba--- Denture Queen.
Tony Orlando--- Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall.
Helen Reddy--- I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore.
Leslie Gore--- It's My Procedure, and I'll Cry If I Want To.
And my favorite:
Willie Nelson--- On the Commode Again
#58
03-08-2008 | 06:33 PM
FTE Leadership Emeritus
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 47,280
Likes: 165
From: DELAWARE, The First State
The Jewish man said, "Last week, my wife and I had great sex. I rubbed her body all over with schmaltz (chicken fat), we made passionate love, and she screamed for five full minutes at the end!"
The Frenchman boasted, "Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with butter. We then made passionate love and she screamed for fifteen minutes!"
The Italian man said, "Well, last week my wife and I also had sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil. We made love, and she screamed for over six hours!"
The other two were stunned. The amazed Frenchman asked, "What could you have possibly done to make your wife scream for six hours?"
The Italian man said, " I wiped my hands on the drapes!"
The Frenchman boasted, "Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with butter. We then made passionate love and she screamed for fifteen minutes!"
The Italian man said, "Well, last week my wife and I also had sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil. We made love, and she screamed for over six hours!"
The other two were stunned. The amazed Frenchman asked, "What could you have possibly done to make your wife scream for six hours?"
The Italian man said, " I wiped my hands on the drapes!"
#59
03-08-2008 | 06:34 PM
FTE Leadership Emeritus
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 47,280
Likes: 165
From: DELAWARE, The First State
Originally Posted by BIGKEN
Wow...1532 posts in the first thread...in just a little over 7 days!!! Can we keep up the momentum??? Can we catch the postitutes in Dela-where???
#60
03-08-2008 | 06:36 PM
Post Fiend
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 18,157
Likes: 0
From: Stanton DE
Originally Posted by glruff
The Jewish man said, "Last week, my wife and I had great sex. I rubbed her body all over with schmaltz (chicken fat), we made passionate love, and she screamed for five full minutes at the end!"
The Frenchman boasted, "Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with butter. We then made passionate love and she screamed for fifteen minutes!"
The Italian man said, "Well, last week my wife and I also had sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil. We made love, and she screamed for over six hours!"
The other two were stunned. The amazed Frenchman asked, "What could you have possibly done to make your wife scream for six hours?"
The Italian man said, " I wiped my hands on the drapes!"
The Frenchman boasted, "Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with butter. We then made passionate love and she screamed for fifteen minutes!"
The Italian man said, "Well, last week my wife and I also had sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil. We made love, and she screamed for over six hours!"
The other two were stunned. The amazed Frenchman asked, "What could you have possibly done to make your wife scream for six hours?"
The Italian man said, " I wiped my hands on the drapes!"
